To Boldly Go Where No Blogger Has Gone Before

Greetings...

I write to you from the far reaches of a civilization nestled in the quiet mountains of Virginia. The journey here was long and curvy, full of bathrooms breaks, and being squished in the back seat between two car seats while trying to feed the babies.

This ancient community is one of idiosyncrasies. While possessing such modern conveniences as a SuperWalmart, pockets of settlers still exist who reside firmly in the dark ages and rely on dial-up for their internet window to the world. As a thoughtful traveler eager to experience the culture of an area - no matter how backward and archaic - I have ventured onto the world wide web via the internet equivalent of a horse and buggy.

My explorations have led me to one conclusion: the great people of this valley have the patience of Job. Whatever trials and tasks one might endure to test one's patience, one has not been truly tested until one has attempted to check one's email using dail-up. It is a task that would drive even a monk insane. Watching the little blue bar at the bottom of the page slowly, slowly, slowly creep towards complete. The joy experienced at the sight of the word "done" popping into view is cut short when one realizes the computer was unable to capture the image and all that one sees is a blank white screen. The whiteness taunts you, laughing at your disappointment and frustration - daring you to try again. Some try. A few succeed. Many give up, deciding that it is better to fail to try, than to try and fail. Others try over and over and over to no avail and finally run screaming into the starlit night. They flee, not noticing the cow fields until it is too late and they have tripped on a cow patty.

For my part, I have fallen somewhere between. I shall pick my battles with this horse and buggy. I will tentatively check email that appears to be text-only, avoiding anything that suggests that pictures are included. I will attempt to report on my traveling companions, Natalie and Abigail, but avoid attempts at posting pictures. Should I try, I am certain I could chew my way through a steel trap before the pictures would appear.

I will attempt contact again, but horses can be unpredictable. Do not fret should communication be short and/or sporadic. Just now, I have narrowly avoided disaster when the internet connection timed out and I was forced to "reconnect". Fearful of impending disconnection and a loss of my message, I must leave quickly.

Take care dear friends...until we meet again on the internet superhighway.


ps - cell phone service is spotty as well. In case of emergency, I can be paged at the SuperWalmart.